i hear ice cream is a must in these situations, so eat up. eat all of it. no regrets. then get another pint (on me, of course) and eat all of that. something sweet, a temporary escape from the bullshit. beware of the brain freeze, though.

okay, this is what you really want, i'm sure. don't drink alone. you know you have at least five people who will drink with you. then you can just be you and we'll hear you out, listen and hug you, give the support you need.

you hate kale, so don't eat it. instead, it has a different purpose. grab it by the stalk and hit it against the wall several times, as hard as you can. perhaps that'll help you feel better. i can clean up the mess later. perhaps wash and make some kale chips out of it. you don't have to eat those.

just because. you know why.